Transformative Healing Power of Embracing Your Emotions

What if the key to your healing lies in the very emotions you push aside?" Our latest episode of Healing Our Kindred Spirits uncovers the hidden power of acknowledging what we often resist. Sharing personal stories, including my own battle with resisting my true identity as an intuitive spiritual medium, we explore how suppressing emotions under societal pressures to "stay strong" can spiral into anxiety, depression, and physical illness. Join us as we challenge these norms and invite you to embrace vulnerability and professional guidance, setting the stage for genuine healing through feeling.

The journey to embracing one's spiritual purpose is not without its hurdles, as I recount my transformative experience with Reiki that followed a miraculous healing from a tumor. This path led me to become a Reiki master teacher and a dedicated conduit for healing, despite personal health setbacks. Discover how integrating holistic healing not only manages chronic pain but enriches the lives of those around me. Our conversation highlights the delicate balance between the draining nature of intuitive work and the profound beauty of helping others connect with loved ones in spirit.

As we explore the profound impact of unprocessed emotions on self-worth and happiness, we stress the importance of breaking free from cycles of pain through validation and healthy expression. From journaling to physical movement, finding messages within our emotions is key to making peace with the past. We also emphasize the importance of community and kindness, urging listeners to connect through our Facebook group, Healing Our Kindred Spirits Podcast. Together, we can champion personal growth and community healing, reminding ourselves that true freedom begins with feeling.

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Chapters

• 0:02 Healing Through Feeling
• 14:43 Embracing Healing and Purpose
• 24:24 Navigating Emotions Towards Healing
• 30:53 Importance of Kindness and Healing

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

Welcome back to Healing Our Kindred Spirits, where we explore the deep, messy and beautiful human experiences that shape us. I'm Donna Gaudet, and today we're talking about a truth that many of us try to ignore what we resist persists. Have you ever tried to push down your emotions, telling yourself to just move on or even stay strong, only to have those same emotions bubble up in unexpected ways? Maybe you get irritated over small things, snap at your loved ones or feel heaviness you can't quite explain. That's because emotions don't just disappear when we ignore them, when we don't take the time to heal what's causing disruption in our lives. Those unhealed emotions can stay with us, showing up in our health, our decisions and especially in our lives. Those unhealed emotions can stay with us, showing up in our health, our decisions and especially in our relationships, whether it's grief, anger or past wounds. Suppressing our pain doesn't free us from it. It binds us to it, and today we're going to talk about how to work towards breaking that cycle. So let's get real, let's get vulnerable and let's talk about why feeling what we feel can help put you on a path to healing. The information, stories and discussions shared on this podcast is for informational purposes only. We are not medical or mental health professionals and nothing in this podcast should be considered a substitute for professional medical, psychological or therapeutic advice. If you are experiencing a medical or mental health issue or crisis, please seek immediate help from a qualified healthcare professional. Please do not stop any medical care or medications you are taking based on what you hear on this podcast. Please discuss this with your healthcare provider, thank you. So let's talk about why feeling your emotions are essential for healing.

Speaker 1: 1:52

Our culture often tells us stay strong, get over it, look on the bright side or the dreaded. Just think positive, while optimism has its place. Real healing happens when we allow ourselves to truly feel what we're going through. When we suppress emotions, they don't just disappear. They can manifest oftentimes as anxiety, depression, physical pain, even many illnesses. But when we acknowledge and process our feelings, we give ourselves the freedom to heal and move forward. So imagine emotions like waves in the ocean. If we fight against them, we exhaust ourselves, but if we let them pass through us, we can ride the waves without drowning in them. The goal isn't to stay stuck in pain. It's to allow emotions to flow through us so they can no longer control us. This is similar to how mindfulness works, and many times we need the help of a qualified therapist to work through those emotions. So please do not hesitate to seek out a qualified therapist to help you with these emotions.

Speaker 1: 2:59

So let's start with the powerful truth. I'm not sure if you've ever heard it, but I have, and it's whatever you resist, persist. And that could pertain to many things in your life, not just emotions or feelings, but it can apply to many things. So what does that mean? It means that when we push down our pain, it doesn't actually go away, it just buries itself deeper. It finds other ways to express itself, often in ways we don't recognize.

Speaker 1: 3:26

Maybe you experienced betrayal years ago, but instead of dealing with the hurt, you convinced yourself that you were fine. And now, in every new relationship, you struggle with trust, even if no one has given you a reason to doubt them. Maybe you were taught as a child that crying was a sign of weakness, so you learned to shove your emotions down. But now, as an adult, you struggle with anxiety or feel disconnected from the people in your life. And, as a side note, if you have children or work with children or have children in your life, please know it is never okay to insist a child not show their emotions, such as sadness, grief, anger. If they are not allowed a safe space to express how they feel, they will turn to acting out. Because such strong emotions for little kids is overwhelming. Imagine how overwhelming it is for us. So imagine with a child and they're looking to you for guidance to help them navigate those feelings. So please have some compassion and do what you can to help them navigate those strong emotions.

Speaker 1: 4:31

Have you ever been made to feel that you had to be a certain way or act a certain way because not doing so would cause more problems for people around you? I've done that many times, especially growing up. Even when we push down who we are and what we are to please other people or to fit in with a society we all do that today that is so set on being one thing or another we find ourselves adapting to fit in with the narrative of what other people think we should be and at the same time, what happens? We lose ourselves and just resist the identity of what we feel and who we are. That is resisting the truth of your own personal identity and that can be detrimental to your physical and your mental health as well. When we resist feeling our emotions they don't dissolve, they transform into patterns, reactions. Our emotions they don't dissolve. They transform into patterns, reactions and self-sabotage.

Speaker 1: 5:32

I'm not a clinical therapist but from my own personal experience I would like to share something. I can't tell you how much I hesitated to reach deep into my soul to find a personal experience to share with you, not because I didn't have any, but because there were so many. When we talk about resisting things and persisting and not being able to heal something unless you feel it, I have so many personal experiences that it was hard to choose which one to share. I really wrestled with this for several days, but I think the most predominant feeling that I resisted, that I took so long to accept, was the fact that I was different, that I was an intuitive spiritual medium. I resisted that title and all the responsibilities that came with it for most of my life because I looked at it as something that caused me so much pain in my young adult life. And now I know that next month, in March, we're going to be devoting all of our episodes to different areas of grief and I was hoping to save this for then. But I'm just going to touch on it briefly.

Speaker 1: 6:34

I had a near death experience when I was around 14 years old. It was our last day of sixth grade and the whole class was going to a classmate's house and we were going swimming. It was kind of like a field day last day of school. The mom did ask if everyone knew how to swim, but I did not want to raise my hand because I was embarrassed that I did not know how to swim and I also did not know. The pool dipped in places and before long I found myself underwater and I was drowning. I remember going through something that was bright and quick and seeing my grandmother in front of me and her telling me that it wasn't my time yet. I still don't know to this day who pulled me out of the pool and saved my life, but someday, if you are listening to this podcast and this is you, I want to thank you so very much for saving my life that day. You'll never understand how grateful I am for you.

Speaker 1: 7:32

Shortly after that happened and I didn't tell my parents what happened I started having abilities that I could not explain. I could see things before they happened. I would know things before they happened. I could see things in my dreams, things before they happen. I would know things before they happen. I could see things in my dreams and then they would happen within days. And you have to understand.

Speaker 1: 7:48

Back in 1977, there was no YouTube, social media or ways to get information, except the library, which had really old encyclopedias and maybe just a few books by Gene Dixon. We didn't have what we have on the internet today to explore what I was feeling. I kept it all to myself. I was 14. And I never shared it with anyone because I was afraid people would think I was crazy. I kept a journal of writing down things that I would see in my dreams or see in my mind, to test my accuracy, and it wasn't until I saw the deaths of two people who were very, very close to me that I could not prevent that.

Speaker 1: 8:30

I became so angry with God that I did not want this so-called gift. I wasn't a religious person. I'm still not a religious person. I was spiritual but not religious. I told God that if I was not able to help the people that I see being hurt, I never wanted to see anything in that way again and I didn't for a very, very long time, but over the years it started to creep back into my life. It started in 1995. Then again, I shut it down, didn't want to see see, flipped it off like a switch. Then it started again in 2003 and I tried to shut it down again, but it kept persisting. And more I resisted, the more persisted. The dreams became more frequent, the images became more frequent and it kept persisting. I resisted because I saw the death of my mom and I remember waking up in the middle of the night and saying out loud please, dear God, not today. It's my birthday and it was my 40th birthday. My mom did pass that day. She passed around.

Speaker 1: 9:37

The time I woke from that nightmare, the guilt and the sadness and the depression and anxiety that came with what I saw was in the inability to prevent it, changed my life. My mom had been ill for a very long time and I know her passing meant she no longer was suffering and I knew that in theory, but I still felt like I could have done something to save her. I went through several months of a deep depression where I was just existing and I'm ashamed to say that there was even a point in my life where I didn't think I could go on anymore and fortunately and I do say fortunately because this little accident saved my life I fell. We were away at the Cape for the weekend. We were at this little antique shop and I fell down a couple of steps and I took a tumble and I shattered my ankle and I don't remember what happened. I don't know how it happened and I had to take several weeks out of work because it was my driving foot and I needed to heal. I couldn't drive, couldn't walk on it. My doctor sent me for an MRI of my brain only because I didn't remember falling and I didn't remember anything from that day. The results came back. That said, I had a pituitary microadenoma, which is a small tumor in my pituitary gland. Surprisingly, the diagnosis didn't faze me. It was as if I didn't care and I didn't seek any follow-up treatment or anything Because, honestly, it didn't matter to me.

Speaker 1: 11:05

During this time out of work I kept feeling being pulled and dragged, recruited to a higher power, but I kept resisting and the more I resisted the more I persisted. My mom was a big believer in angels and I never understood her connection to them. Now I do, but back then I didn't. I don't know where I would be today without guidance from angels in my life. But I kept feeling this energy around me that was light and love. And because I was such in a dark place, I kept resisting it, and the more I resisted, the more it persisted. I tried blocking it out, I tried talking myself out of feeling everything. It just nothing was working. There was this light around me that was trying to get in, but I just kept pushing it away.

Speaker 1: 11:56

Now this was a point in my life where I hadn't learned anything about spirituality or holistic healing or anything. And during this time home for several weeks, I kept hearing songs come on the TV, very insightful songs, josh, josh Groban, for one. It was just all these songs, you know, were just touching me in ways, and the more I resisted, the more I heard them and it was as if the universe said you need to hear this and it made me feel something I had not felt in a very long time because I had been numb for so long. And then I kept hearing the word Reiki, r-e-i-k-i. I had never heard that word in my life. I did not know what it was, but I looked it up online and I found out that it was a type of universal healing energy. I ignored it, went on with my days and kept pushing and pushing and pushing. But it kept pushing back and I had to keep going back. I kept going back to look at it, to research it.

Speaker 1: 12:59

One day, a notification came up that there was going to be a one-day class about an hour and a half from where I lived. I don't know what propelled me to sign up for that class, but I did Again. The more I resisted, the more this intuition persisted. For some reason I knew I needed to be there, but I did not know why. When I took the class that day, there was only myself, the person facilitating the class, and two other people. And when I had my Reiki level one attunement, I felt as if something broke open inside of me and these shards of light just felt as if they were coming out of me, as if everything I had held on to in my entire life, that was so bad, that was just so broken, opened up and all of this light that was coming out was also coming in. I remember sobbing during my attunement because it was the first time in so long that I felt such unconditional love and I felt so loved and protected.

Speaker 2: 14:09

For the first time in my life, I felt I was here for a reason and a purpose. It was a purpose that I had resisted my entire life, but it kept persisting until I finally, finally had no choice but to listen to it. It felt as if this was the missing piece to the puzzle that I struggled with my entire life. That one class sent me on a path of healing where there are no words to explain how I felt. My doctor was sending me for another MRI to see the status of what was going on, because I had been two months and I had not followed up.

Speaker 1: 14:51

I remember sitting there before the MRI and a couple of days before I had gone to the cemetery and my mom's grave. I had gone to see her because it was her birthday, february 13th, and I remember sitting there, standing there at the grave, and I was talking to her and I was talking to God and the angels and whoever in the spirit world would listen to me, and I made a promise that, if they let me be okay, I would spend the rest of my life living my purpose. I would spend the rest of my life living my purpose and never resisting my calling or question why I'm here again and that I would help as many people as I could. When I went in for the MRI, the doctor came in and was baffled because where the tumor was just a few short months earlier, there was nothing there. They did lab work, they did everything, but there were no markers. He wanted to pursue it further and I said no, I'm good, there's nothing there, I'm confident that I'm healed. I knew that I had been given a precious gift. That was the gift that I had to live up to. I had to stop resisting the gifts that were given to me when I had that near-death experience, and I had to look at it as a gift and not a curse, and understand that it is not my job to change the outcome of what is going to happen or tell someone's future, predict someone's future, but to be able to be there to help people, to be a guide on their journey. That was my mission.

Speaker 1: 16:23

It was only after learning Reiki that everything opened up for me in my life. I took every class and workshop that I could do to enhance the tools that I had used to help other people. I worked toward my Reiki master teacher level. I took certifications at anything that felt teacher level. I took certifications at anything that felt I felt guided to. I wasn't afraid, like I was before. If, if the intuition came to me that I needed to take this, I did. And when I got my Reiki master teacher level, it took me four years, but I did it, and teaching Reiki was one of the most wonderful, amazing things that I've ever done and it still remains the one thing that I faithfully do on myself and with loved ones that need it every day. It does. I even do it on my animals, and it doesn't matter how many certifications I did over the years, how many workshops and titles I earned.

Speaker 1: 17:15

What it comes down to is that I was here for a reason. I was here for a purpose is that I was here for a reason. I was here for a purpose, and when I stopped resisting that purpose, my life opened up in amazing ways. Being of service to others gave me my greatest joy, and it wasn't about fixing people or affecting the outcome of fate. It was just allowing my intuition and my own faith to guide me to help others on their journey.

Speaker 1: 17:42

I faithfully stayed on this path from 2004 to 2017. And there was a brief period in 2010, when my dad passed, that I had to take a break from everything because of my health. But I truly believe that if I had not learned the skills for spiritual and holistic healing, I know without a doubt I would not have survived that year. When I got very ill in 2017, I could no longer work, I could no longer do the things I used to do and I had to give up my career as a licensed massage therapy instructor, and I had to give up my healing practice. My career as a massage therapy instructor provided my income, but my spiritual practice provided my spiritual support, the medication that I had to take to be able to help with pain, anxiety, blood pressure and everything else that went along with it affected my abilities to be able to connect intuitively. It was as if, within a couple of days, everything that I had learned, believed in and practiced today was taken from me. It has taken me a long time to recover and I still have many limitations, but I still use those holistic healing skills and abilities that I learned to help me with my own chronic pain and manage my chronic illnesses, as well as those close to me.

Speaker 1: 19:06

I no longer do intuitive readings only because it is very draining. And I am still intuitive because it never goes away and I truly believe we are all intuitive and have the ability to connect. We just need to foster that gift a little bit more. And I still see things and feel things before they happen, and that is part of being an empath. I am better equipped these days to handle those emotions and what comes with it better than I used to be, but I miss the part of my life where I could help people to be able to heal through their grief and their sadness and whatever else had going on. It's not about ego, it's about being of service. So when you can connect to a loved one in spirit, with someone sitting across from you whom you have no idea who they are except their first name, and you're able to help them make that connection and receive messages for their own healing by getting yourself out of the equation, just being the messenger, it is one of the most beautiful experiences in the world and I do miss it. Even though my ability is still there to a degree, I don't ever see myself going back to doing it again because, like I said, it is very draining.

Speaker 1: 20:20

So whether you believe in mediums or spirit mediums or anything like that, I was not like the kind you see on TV anybody that's showy or that was not me, anybody that's showy or that was not me. I never advertised what I did, I just people would find me. But it's your decision to make what to believe. I'm not trying to sway you either way, but what I resisted kept persisting and I was not able to heal parts of my life until I could fully feel what I was feeling and accept the reason why I was here. And I will admit, at times I get called. I do get a calling to do energy work again, as I did in my private practice. It's always in the back of my mind, but I don't have the stamina to do that right now. I would love to teach Reiki again, as it's still one of my passions, and maybe I will dip my foot into that pond in the near future. We'll have to see. But I do know that I no longer resist the intuition or the passion or the inclination to explore the opportunities. I may not be able to do what I used to do in the way I used to do them, but I can do them in a different way. And this is why this podcast was born, because I still felt I had something to share. And even though the opportunities or what I come up with may not work out the way I want them to, at least I'm allowing myself to explore them without resisting and, as a whole, by allowing myself to feel what I was feeling, it did heal my life in many ways. So let's talk about what happens when we don't heal.

Speaker 1: 21:52

Unprocessed emotions don't just affect us, they affect everyone around us. Think about it like this If you had a deep cut on your hand and you ignored it, refusing to clean or bandage it, what would happen, it wouldn't heal on its own. It would fester, get infected and eventually cause more pain and problems. The same thing happens with emotional wounds. So some of the areas that can be affected by unprocessed emotions are relationships, because unprocessed pain can make us guarded, reactive or even distant. Maybe you push people away before they have the chance to hurt you, or maybe you find yourself in the same toxic relationships over and over and over. These patterns aren't coincidences. They're a reflection. A reflection of your unhealed wounds and even mental and emotional well-being.

Speaker 1: 22:39

Suppressed emotions can lead to anxiety, depression and a constant feeling of unease. When we don't allow ourselves to process what we feel, our nervous system stays in a heightened state of stress, of fight or flight. I had a difficult time grieving or working through my grief, and it affected me on many levels. And it also affects your physical health. Did you know that chronic stress, tension and even certain illnesses can be linked to repressed emotions? The mind-body connection is real. Please, please, please, look into this. The mind-body connection is real. When we bottle up pain, our body holds onto it, and too often in the form of headaches, digestive issues, chronic fatigue, chronic pain. When I was working my teaching job, I had to deal with a very difficult campus director and I was stressed every day. I know for a fact that the health issues I started with in April of 2017 was directly related to the daily stress I had to endure every day.

Speaker 1: 23:44

And I don't know if you've ever heard of Louise Hay, but the late, great Louise Hay, which I admire and still do to this day, wrote many books, but one in particular is called Heal your Body A to Z. Heal your Body A to Z and talks about how everything that happens to us physically starts with an emotion. For example, if you have lower back pain, an emotional cause could be fear of money or a lack of financial support. Another example is hip problems, which could be the fear of going forward in major decisions Nothing to move forward to and I'm going to put the link to that book in the show notes, the episode notes, so that way you can look for it wherever you purchase books.

Speaker 1: 24:24

And it also can affect our self-worth. Unhealed wounds can make us feel like we're not enough or that we don't deserve happiness. If we've been hurt and never dealt with it, we might subconsciously keep ourselves stuck in situations that reaffirm our pain. Maybe we choose partners who mistreat us, staying in jobs that drain us or never allow ourselves to feel true joy. When I talked about losing two very close people to me and feeling responsible even though I know it wasn't my fault it can make you feel stuck, and I was I felt as if I didn't deserve to feel joy again because it affected my self-worth. And here's the hard truth If we don't face what's hurting us, we will keep living out the same story over and over again.

Speaker 1: 25:14

Healing isn't just about feeling better. It's about breaking cycles so that we don't pass our pain on to ourselves and others. So now that we understand why feeling our emotions is so important, let's talk about how to actually do it. Here are some steps to help you navigate the process in a healthy, productive way. Number one, step number one acknowledge that your feelings are valid. The first step to healing is giving yourself permission to feel your pain, your grief, your anger. It's all valid. There's nothing weak about feeling emotions. In fact, it takes incredible strength to sit with discomfort instead of running from it.

Speaker 1: 25:51

Number two name what you're feeling. The first step is simple but powerful Name your emotion. Are you sad, angry, grieving, frustrated. Are you all of the above? Often we feel overwhelmed because we don't even know what we feel. So take a deep breath and ask yourself what is this emotion? Where do I feel it in my body? Naming it gives you control over it, instead of letting it control you. If you cannot name it, give it a color, a shape. Find some way to give it its own identification. Step number three sit with your emotions instead of avoiding them. This can be difficult. Only you know by my own self-admission. It can be challenging, but it can be done.

Speaker 1: 26:41

Instead of distracting yourself with TV, food, social media, doom scrolling or work, take time to sit with your emotions. Let yourself feel without judgment. If you need to cry, cry. If you're angry, write it out or move your body. Emotions are energy. If we don't allow them to move through us, they get stuck.

Speaker 1: 27:03

And number four find the message in your emotion. Every emotion is trying to tell you something. Maybe anger is telling you a boundary has been crossed. Maybe sadness is reminding you of something that needs to be grieved. Instead of pushing feelings away, ask what is this emotion trying to teach me. Once you've identified your emotion, allow yourself to feel it without judgment. If you're sad, cry. If you're angry, acknowledge it. Instead of resisting or numbing your feelings, give yourself permission to simply be with them. Set a timer for five to ten minutes and let the emotion fully surface. It might feel intense, but I promise you it won't last forever.

Speaker 1: 27:47

Feeling your emotions doesn't mean staying stuck in them, but the goal is to process and release them so you can move forward. Healing is not a straight line. Some days you'll feel it'll feel heavy than others, but when you choose to feel, instead of being numb, you give yourself the gift of true freedom. So today I challenge you when an emotion arises, don't run, sit with it. Feel it, let it move through you, because healing happens when we have the courage to face what we feel. And many of you may have experienced terrible things in your life, and this is why it's important to seek out a qualified therapist to help you through this process.

Speaker 1: 28:23

You don't have to do it alone. Step five express it in a healthy way. Feelings need an outlet. Write in a journal, talk to a friend or even speak out loud to yourself If you're angry. Try movement, go for a walk, do yoga, punch a pillow yes, really punch a pillow. Some places have these rooms where you can go and break and smash things I think they're called smash rooms. That would work. I have even gone into a closet and screamed and yes, this does work. The goal is to express, not suppress, but find what works for you. And then we have step number six practice.

Speaker 1: 29:04

Self-compassion. Healing isn't about getting rid of your emotions. It's about learning to be kind to yourself through them. Talk to yourself like you, would a dear friend Say it's okay to feel this, I'm safe, I'll get through this. Self-compassion is a bridge between pain and healing, and if you can find an affirmation that you can resonate with, it's not about toxic positivity, but a mantra that you can repeat to help you with self-compassion.

Speaker 1: 29:30

Here are three examples, but feel free to create your own. Number one I give myself permission to feel this human experience. I'm allowed to make mistakes and learn from them without judgment. Number two I am worthy of love and kindness, especially from myself. I choose to treat myself with the same care I offer others. And number three I am doing my best and that is enough. I honor my progress, no matter how small. So how do we move forward?

Speaker 1: 30:02

Healing isn't about erasing your past. It's about making peace with it. It's about understanding that feeling your emotions doesn't mean drowning in them. It means allowing them to move through you so that you can move forward. If you spent years pushing down pain or resisting things that have come into your life that could bring you opportunities, I want you to know it's not too late to heal. The fact that you're here listening to this means you're already taking a step toward healing, and that's something to be proud of. So today I invite you to try something different. Instead of running from your feelings, sit with them. Instead of numbing, allow yourself to feel, because healing starts the moment we stop resisting and start embracing what's inside of us.

Speaker 1: 30:53

I want to thank you for sharing this space with me today and, if you found this helpful, please consider subscribing and sharing this episode with someone who might need to hear it. Please consider joining our Facebook group page called Healing Our Kindred Spirits Podcast and feel free to email me with any questions, concerns or if you have a story to share and would like to be a guest on our podcast. You can reach me at healingourkindredspirits at gmailcom, or you can DM me through our Facebook group. And, as a reminder, I want you to be kind to yourself and others. If you can. I want you to be kind to yourself and others, if you can. We are living in a tough time right now and we need to allow grace for ourselves and others. Be that shining light for others, if you can, and always remember that you matter. Remember healing starts with feeling. Until next time, take care and be kind to yourself.